Top 5 Dating Questions - Answered Truthfully

So, ran across another Shine article, this one being about top dating questions that were apparently asked. While I find it hard to believe that someone actually asked some of these, I found their answers to be a bit silly. So I figured, if all they're going to do is recycle crap advice from previous articles, someone should take a stab at honesty. *ProTip: don't come to me for dating advice.*

Question 1: If I'm So Awesome, Why Am I Still Single?
Probably because you're not all that awesome. Unless your awesomeness factor is off the scale (as measured by your peers, not you), then you can't rely on that to get you a date. Try upping your interesting factor or your cash factor. Both of those will help.

Question 2: How Do I Get a Cutie to Ask Me Out?
Have you tried wearing a sign? I hear neon is coming back in style, so that's an option. Just make sure it doesn't actually say 'desperate' on it. You're trying to be subtle!

Question 3: Why Do I Keep Attracting Losers?
Check to make sure your sign doesn't say something like "Losers Apply Here". If you're not wearing your sign, try picking up guys when you're not drunk. Alcohol is the Loser's mating call, and they will respond from across a large room.

Question 4: How Do I Get a Guy I'm Not Interested in to Leave Me Alone? TASERs speak louder than words. If that doesn't work, Cosmo has plenty of tips. Granted, they're for getting back at your boyfriend when he's being a dick, but most of them will translate to this situation pretty easily.

Question 5: How Do I Keep Dating When I'm so Bored, Frustrated, Rejected, Hopeless?
The same way as everyone else: by going to the bar. You'll find plenty more in your boat, and while it might not make for a pleasant evening, at least you'll have company! Of course, the other option is not to date for a while and focus on things you like doing, but that won't get you laid.
07/23/12 11:44, by , Categories: dubird.net , Tags: , ,